Unorthodox and Satmar

I finished reading Unorthodox over the weekend. With all the allegations out there of things in the book being made up, I can't speak as to the accuracy of what's written. I can state that the book is extremely well written. I did enjoy reading it. 

Honestly, I have a lot of pity for this woman. My grandfather went through the Holocaust, and because of it, he was never very good at showing his children that he really cared for them. Not to say he didn't love them - of course he did! But he just had a hard time showing it. 

Deborah Feldman did not have parents who raised her. She was raised by grandparents who, by her account, also did not know how to show very well that they cared. This personality might have worked in Europe, but it doesn't work in the modern world. Her aunt, who appointed herself to look over Deborah, was the same way.

The school had an issue I've seen in many schools. Chanoch la'naar al pi darko? Forget about it. Here's our mold, now fit in it. Oh, you don't fit? Too bad for you. Find another place to go. If only she'd been nurtured according to her strengths and weaknesses, things would have turned out differently.

This brings me to Satmar as a whole. In the book, she quotes her grandfather as saying that the Satmar Rebbe decided to be extra stringent on everything because of the Holocaust. He decided that God wouldn't punish them anymore if they because so stringent. Giving fire and brimstone speeches to girls doesn't work for this. Deborah wrote how after eating something and discovering it was a pork product, she ran to the bathroom, waiting to vomit - because she'd been taught that was what happened when you ate pork. When she didn't vomit, she said, "Hey, this must not be so bad!"

This is exactly the sin of Adam HaRishon. He told Chava "Don't touch the fruit or you'll die!" When she touched it and nothing happened, she didn't think eating it would be so bad.

One thing I've asked on various sites is proof that there are lies in her book. I don't mean an email copied and pasted on an anonymous blog that may or may not have come from a relative of hers. I mean real proof, that would stand up in court. I haven't seen any yet. This doesn't mean I approve of the book. I think it is a big chillul Hashem. However, it is just another one coming out of Satmar. The Satmar people are saying, "How dare she air our dirty laundry in public!" Yet, Satmar has been doing that for quite a while already. Two "Rebbes" went to the US court system over who would take over from their father. It was a fight all about money. This isn't airing out your dirty laundry? I remember a few years ago there was a story that a fight broke out at a cemetery because the groups of the two "Rebbes" were there at the same time.

Never mind all the things about mechitzas on buses and other such stupidities. Deborah Feldman's book is a chillul Hashem, but it pales in comparison to the chillul Hashem that is Satmar Chassidus as a whole.