Modern chinuch

Matzav has a story posted about a menahel from a yeshiva who used public humiliation as a means of chinuch. It backfired on him when some former students threatened to kill him, and later beat him up.
He went to R' Shteinman about the issue. He wanted to know if he had been teaching wrong all of his career.
R' Shteinman told him that years ago, that was the way chinuch was done, and it was proper for those times. In modern times, you can't do it, as it causes more harm than good.
I think R' Shteinman is being misquoted here. Yes, years ago teachers used to hit students. That was the norm, and it worked for those times. Public humiliation is never an option.
The chareidim come up with all different reasons why kids are going OTD. They blame TV, the Internet, cell phones, and other things. Maybe they should look in their own backyard. Child molestation that gets covered up, Rabbis humiliating kids, and the overall pressure to sit and learn - and if you don't, you're a failure.
I was publicly humiliated by some of my Rabbeim in Yeshiva. That was what led me to going OTD. These people who never went through anything like that have the nerve to call themselves experts and claim to know exactly what drives kids off. They know nothing.

Shabbos Protests are Important?

Arutz Sheva has a story about how R' Aryeh Stern, who is a religious Zionist Rabbi, said that the Shabbos protests in Jerusalem are important, as long as they're not violent.
I think there is some truth to that, although I disagree on one big point. He says the protests themselves are important. I don't agree. I think he's right that they can't be violent, but I think it's the right to protest that's important, not the protests themselves. So Intel wants to have it's non-Jewish workers work on Shabbos. So what? There's nothing wrong with that. But, if people want to protest, they have that right - it's called free speech.
So, as I said, the right to protest is important, not the actual protest itself. And yes, it must remain calm.

Rubashkin

Yesterday, Shalom Rubashkin was found guilty on 86 different counts. The Jewish news sites were filled with comments about it. The editor of Matzav, which had adopted Rubashkin as their cause to support, probably had a coronary when he heard it.
While I am saddened at the news, some of the things which were said were uncalled for. Matzav's headline was "Injustice is served", and "The Blood Libel Continues". Excuse me? Blood libel? How can tey dare compare the crimes commited by this man to the blood libels which led to the deaths of thousands of innocent people? Rubashkin did wrong, he admitted it. He simply claimed ignorance, that he didn't know what was going on. Did the Jews in Europe claim that yes, they took the blood of a non-Jewish child, but didn't realize it was wrong? Of course not!
Then, to say injustice is served? As I said, he admitted that things happened. Whether he was directly responsible or not, he still served in a position where he should have known what was going on. People testified that he actually did know what was going on, as they had reported it to him. He claimed he didn't know it was wrong to do. Well then, learn the law. The fact is, if you break the law, you're going to pay for it. That';s the story in this case.
Is it heartbreaking? Yes. My heart goes out to his family. I don't think he harmed anyone with it. However, it's hardly an injustice. He broke the law. That's clear. Now he has to pay the consequences.

The infamous Joseph

On Yeshiva World, there is a poster who spews the most vile comments on a regular basis. He bashes Modern Orthodoxy all the time, and says terrible things about our Rabbonim. Well, he finally revealed himself.
Most of what he posts was re-posted yesterday on Matzav.com. They originally had his full name up as the author, but changed it to his initials. His name is Yosef Tropper. On Yeshiva World, he's known as Joseph. He's also posted on Matzav before as Yoisef and Yosef. I really can't stand this guy.

Anyway, some of the comments on his story are really bad. Here's one comment about MO:
"Take a look at one of your ‘modern’ boys on the street - save for a yarmulkah he looks like a total shaigetz!"

I think I'd rather look like a sheigetz and be honest than look like a frum Jew and cause a chillul Hashem every other day.

Carlebach

I was talking to a friend of mine over Shabbos, and the subject of Carlebach came up. The minyan he goes to on Friday nights decided to have a Carlebach davening this week, and didn't tell anyone. They found out when Kabbolas Shabbos started. A bunch of guys were upset, as that meant davening would take significantly longer than usual. My friend, who is not the biggest Carlebach fan in the world (that's an understatement), said if they want to do the davening, fine - just let people know in advance.

I just wanted to bring up a point about Carlebach. For some reason, he has achieved a cult following, and I just don't see why. Yes, he had a lot of qualities we should try to emulate, and there are things we can learn from him. However, that doesn't take away from what he really was: a horny guy who grabbed as many women as he could, blatantly violated halachah and tried to defend his actions with some nonsensical argument, was accused of molesting underage girls, and was just basically a hippie. We should learn about loving your fellow Jew from him? Big deal, all hippies were into the love and peace thing. What should our kids learn from him? That it's ok to hug and kiss strange women if you know how to sing?
My friend told me someone asked him why they did a Carlebach davening this Shabbos. He replied that since in the Parshah we had the story of Paroah, they did the Carlebach davening. The Parshah deals with someone who lusted after strange women, and so did Carlebach. I thought it was a great answer.

Just to note, if you want to read all about the "great" Carlebach's activities that you don't hear about, read this.

Previous post

Some people may have noticed that I removed the post about the gemachs. I just want to clarify why I did that. The only reason was because the people involved with the Teaneck based gemach asked that the post be removed. That's it.

Chalav Yisrael

For some reason, the issue of chalav Yisrael has gained more attention than most other subjects in the chareidi internet world. It's been debated numerous times, and for some reason it keeps coming back.
Today, Matzav had an article up about it, and reviewing R' Moshe Feinstein zt"l's heter for drinking milk not supervised by a Jew in the US. Now, the OU has a very respected chareidi posek on its kashrus board in R' Yisroel Belsky. He has paskened that cholov stam milk, as it's called, is permissible. However, that's not enough for them.
Some people will quote a letter R' Moshe wrote which says it should only be used b'shaas hadchak (when there's really no alternative). However, nobody mentions the context of his letter. A yeshiva, which had served only chalav Yisrael milk for years, was thinking of switching, and wanted to know his opinion. He replied that it should only be done b'shaas hadchak. This is clearly a psak for a yeshiva, and not the general public. Yet, they conveniently leave that part out.
Then, they introduced a new issue: some cows get gas trapped in one of their stomachs, and have a surgical procedure to release the pressure. Some are nervous that this makes the cow a treifah, and its milk can't be used. R' Belsky looked into the issue, and paskened that it's not a problem. Is that enough for them? Of course not. After all, it's not a chumrah, and chumros are what chareidim do best.
Then there are the people that write that drinking chalav Yisrael is good for your soul, and drinking chalav stam isn't. Well, according to R' Moshe, regular milk is chalav Yisrael. If you learn his teshuva, that's pretty clear. So, this point is a non-issue.
The people then resort to pointing out that we rely on R' Moshe's heter for milk, but we don't listen to him on Shabbos clocks, which he held aren't allowed. The answer to this is pretty simple: if your Rav was R' Moshe, they might have a point. However, my Rav can base his psak on whatever he wants, and I can do what my Rav tells me. However, their claim of hypocrisy is kind of funny. I've written before about A TIME, the fertility organization. The Satmar Rav zt"l held that IVF was assur. Many other poskim held the same. R' Moshe allowed it, and most poskim use this heter. So, any chareidi person who holds IVF is ok shouldn't use Shabbos clocks, right?
I guess it's the usual holier than thou attitude coupled with the usual hypocrisy.

Nusach

One thing I have to say I enjoy about the Yeshivish world is when it comes to davening, they know how to use proper nusach. Since I moved to Teaneck, I've often complained to people about the lack of nusach in davening. We have such beautiful tunes for davening, that have been around for a really long time, but people don't use them. They just pick some tune that came out recently, and use that instead.
Kedushah? Forget it, that's the worst.ot only do they need to sing the entire thing, they need to pick a different tune for each verse. I really can't stand it.
On Yom Kippur, most of the Baalei Tefillah where I davened were guilty of this. During Selichos Sunday night, the guy davening had a tune for everything - after Kol Nidrei, he didn't use one bit of nusach, he literally sang every single thing. During Shacharis, the guy also sang everything. Musssaf wasn't bad, but the guy didn't do much nusach either - he just said a lot of stuff, but at least he made an effort. Mussaf is a tough tefillah to daven, and he did try. Minchah was good, but how much is there to sing there? Really not much. During Neillah, the guy did use nussach, but the problem was, he used the wrong nusach. Neilah and Geshem/Tal do not have the same nusach! He thought they do. Sorry, but they don't. Neilah has one of the most beautiful tunes from any of the nusachos (nuschaos?) and he didn't use it.
It's just a peeve of mine, but it ticks me off.

Kaparos

For the past few years, there has been a lot of controversy surrounding the practice of kaparos. PETA has come out against using chickens, together with many other animals rights groups.
When I was young, my family used chickens - until one year, one of them took a crap on my mom. It was only money after that.
There have been reports of people being cited for health code violations at the site where they do it with chickens. There were feces on the ground, it smelled terrible, and some other things. Neighbors complained, the cops and health department came down, and found these issues.
I'm in favor of calling an end to the practice of using chickens. Look at the chillul Hashem it has caused. Would it be so bad to use money?
"But it's our minhag!" people scream. Is it also your minhag to cause a chillul Hashem during the aseres y'mei teshuvah? Because that's what you're doing. You cry anti-semitism, but you don't realize that your actions are what is causing it. You want to do it with chickens? Fine, just follow the law. You can say they're looking for something, and they want to be able to cite you. That may be so, but why allow it? Just do everything correctly, and it won't be a problem.
Or just use money.
I'd just like to note, I'm not an animal rights person. Far from it. I think PETA are a bunch of lunatics, and I hate cats and dogs. I'm just upset at the chillul Hashem being caused.

Jewish Internet

A few years ago, Rabbonim in the Chareidi world came out fighting against the internet. It was banned in Lakewood, and pretty much everyone else said it should be avoided as much as possible.
People responded by pointing out that it was needed for life now - everything is done online. Overall, the ban was a failure. Just look at sites like Yeshiva World, Matzav, and Vos Iz Neias to see how many chareidim are using the internet for things other than parnassah.

Matzav announced the other day that they're starting their own network, offering internet, a business internet filter, and phone service, at a price that will be subsidized. They even have a letter signed by some Roshei Yeshivos endorsing it.

I'm all in favor of their starting their own network. It's about time they realized that you can't avoid the internet. However, I don't understand the subsidizing of the cost. People are struggling to make ends meet. Schools are in danger of closing. So, what are teh rich chareidim doing? Subsidizing the cost of the internet. Why not donate money to schools? That's where it should be going first.

This site takes the cake

I recently saw this site linked to by Off the Derech.
Now, I have problems with lots of sites, including OTD (your obsession with Garnel isn't healthy. You might want to discuss it with a professional.) This site, however, beats them all. The sheer hatred this guy exhibits is astounding. I don't need to write it here, go check it out yourself.

A few different items

First off, I was very glad to read that this past Shabbos, the protest against the parking lot was peaceful. There was little or no violence. It seems they heeded the call of R' Shternbuch, and kept it calm. It's about time!

Second: I've posted in teh past about people collecting money. I had someone knock on my door the other day, collecting for families in Israel. He had the letters supporting him. I told him I couldn't help him too much, as there are families in my community who need help also, and they came first. He showed me a letter from R' Elyashiv saying that poor people of Jerusalem come before your own city. he then told me that he understands if my Rabbi said differently, but he just wanted to point out an opposing view. He also showed me a letter from R' Schachter encouraging everyone to support his organization. That was enough for me. I gave him a check. Not for a ton, but for something.
What really struck me was how nice and polite he was the entire time. he didn't come across as pushy, as many of these people do. Why can't all of the collectors be like him?

Third: I saw a thread on Yeshiva World's coffee room the other day. It was about the OU and the NCYI. The poster thought they could be combined. Now, I don't want to get into whether that is a good idea or not.
After a while, it of course turned into people bashing the NCYI. So, the mods went and locked the thread. However, you have to notice their timing: there were some posts bashing it. Then they locked it. If those posts were a problem, why post them at all? just erase them. But no - they post the attacks, and don't give anyone a chance to stand up in defense of the NCYI.
Typical.

It's about time

I saw today that R' Moshe Shternbuch, head of the Eida Beis Din, spoke out very strongly against the violent protests. Finally!

View of Modern Orthodoxy

In discussions on various websites, I've come across one thing several times: chareidim have a total misunderstanding of Modern Orthodoxy.
They all think that MO means you can do whatever you want. Dress inappropriately, mixed swimming, make out with your girlfriend all day, etc.
I don't know where they got this idea from, but that is not what it's about. If you ask a MO Rabbi if it's ok for a married woman to not cover her hair in public, they'll tell you it's not ok. Yes, many woman don't cover their hair. That doesn't make it right. We simply realize that pushing the issue will probably do more harm than good. The same goes for other issues.
Chareidim see Judaism as an all-or-nothing deal. MO says do what you can now, and try to work on yourself in the way that works best for you. We also don't take unecessary chumros on ourselves like chareidim do.
Ultimately, the idea behind MO is that frum Jews can integrate into society while maintaining our religious beliefs. Chareidim can't accept that.

Lakewood crying anti-semitism again

There was an article on Matzav today about chavrusah tumult in Lakewood today. The cops came around, and ticketed all the cars that were parked illegally. Of course, people are saying they were targeted because they're Jewish. It doesn't occur to them to park legally.
I wrote as much in the comments section. Here was a response I got:

Mr. Orthowatch,

How did you select such a revolting name?

BTW, were you by chavrusa tummult in Lakewood? Based on your self description on you blog, I dare say not. In fact, I doubt you have ever even been inside the Beis Medrash in Lakewood. The point anyway is that how can you say that these people were parked illegaly, you were NOT there and are not even familiar with the area. People who were there are telling you that many of those ticketed were in fact parked legaly. Such dispicable hate aginst those who choose to sit and learn because they sit and learn is an indication of your bitter unsatisfatory life. May Hkb”h send you refuas hanefesh very soon.

I wrote back a long thing explaining that I know more about Lakewood and the yeshiva world than he might think. It probably won't get published, so I'll post it here. It also gives some of my background, which some people might find interesting.

You know nothing about my life. Would you like me to tell you a little bit?
I grew up in a very frum family. I went to the typical Brooklyn, right wing yeshivos. I wasn’t cut out to sit and learn. I didn’t enjoy it too much. So, what did my Rabbeim do? Did they try to encourage me? Were they nice to me? No, I was embarrassed in front of the entire class, numerous times. I complained to my rebbe more than once that kids made fun of me afterwards because of what he said to me during class. He told me that it was my fault for not learning well, and if I learned well, it wouldn’t happen.
That was when I made up my mind that I never wanted to be a rebbe or a kollel guy. Then, I once said off hand to a rebbe of mine that I planned on going to college. In front of the entire shiur, he told me that I was a shaigetz, adding “because only shegatzim go to college.”
I switched out of that yeshiva and went to another one, where I did well for a few years. I developed a firm foundation in yiddishkeit. However, the yeshiva began to change. It began moving farther to the right. White shirts were required. Only black velvet yarmulkas were allowed. Then, they brought in a new rosh yeshiva. We didn’t exactly see eye to eye. The yeshiva then got its own Gestapo - the so-called “elter bochurim” who were the “best guys” in the yeshiva. They went into my dorm room, went through my things, and took a bunch of stuff they felt I shouldn’t have in the yeshiva. I always enjoyed reading, and I had some novels. They took them all. I went to the rosh yeshiva and told him about it. he told me I wasn’t allowed to have them in the dorm, and the rule was that if you had them, you forfeited them. He said they were burned.
I began having a lot of questions. Was this was learning did to you? Made you steal from people? I saw all the time the things which are coming out now - “frum” Jews cheating on taxes. Stealing from other people. Treating other people like garbage. I asked many of the rabbeim there those questions, but never got any real answers. I left the yeshiva after that year and went to college. I even went to Touro, in an attempt to stay in the Jewish world. I enrolled in a small yeshiva for half a day. The rebbe there was no different. Same story all over again. A few months into that school year, I stopped being frum. No kosher, no shabbos, no nothing.
That lasted for a about a year. Something happened, and I decided to be frum again. Now, I am a frum Jew again. I keep kosher, keep Shabbos, and do everything to the best of my ability. Are there things I still struggle with? Yes, of course. Everyone struggles with something.
However, I had seen the hypocrisy of many people in the yeshiva system. Yes, I’ve been inside the Lakewood beis medrash. I have family members who are roshei yeshiva. I have many family members (brothers and cousins) who went to Lakewood. I’ve been there many times, believe me.
The fact is that people in Lakewood try to find anti-semitism in everything. Anytime something happens to the frum community, they cry anti-semitism. Well, it’s not. I’ve been to many frum areas when something big is going on, and I can tell you - people park illegally. The police wouldn’t risk giving out that many tickets illegally. It’s too easy to prove, and they’d all lose their jobs and pensions over it.